Would You Go Out with this Guy?

11 Nov

I came across a few blogs about matchmaking in the very orthodox world via Rafi’s Haveil Havalim #140 post .

I have my own thoughts and feelings on the subject but I am not yet ready to expand on how I feel about the whole matchmaking, dating and marriage issue here on this blog. Needless to say it is a very touchy and personal subject for me.


Now… if someone suggested you date one of the following – would you?
(Found this list on Bad4Shudduchim)

Mr. Perfect #1: He’s a BT (grew up not religious but became religious), and his father was involved in an Eastern polytheistic religion. He’s been involved in umpteen political disputes – must be a strange bird – and his brother committed suicide.

Mr. Perfect #2: His grandfather worshipped idols. His father married someone 40 years younger than himself – something odd there. His mother is from a non-kosher home, his twin brother went off the path, and he spent many of his formative years working for his uncle, a professional con artist. Makes you wonder about his religious education.

Mr. Perfect #3: His father is a BT whose other wife was a non-jew, so his half-brother is an Arab. His mother had some medical issues – we don’t know what they are but she was childless for years – could be genetic. And she died very suddenly after her husband tried to kill their son. Do you really want to get involved in that kind of family?

Mr. Perfect #4: His mother died young – they won’t say of what. His character traits are suspect and have led to him being alienated from his family. He was arrested and thrown in jail for attacking a woman (of course he claims he’s innocent), and his great-grandfather was a hardcore member of a weird cult.

Mr. Perfect #5: His parents divorced and then remarried – can you imagine? His sister is still single – must be something wrong with her. He was a preemie. He never got speech therapy and you can barely understand what he says. His parents abandoned him when he was a baby and he was adopted by non-Jews. He turned against them, killed a man, and would have received capital punishment if he hadn’t run away. And nobody really knows what he did in all those years before he came back…

Mr. Perfect #6: He’s descended from a non jewish woman – and not necessarily a kosher one, if you hold by a different rav. He’s not very sophisticated: spends most of his time playing music to the sheep. He has the look of a born killer – there’s just something about him… And though they won’t release his record, the government doesn’t chase after someone like that for nothing.

Mr. Perfect #7: His mother was once caught praying in the Mishkan (the holy temporary temple) while drunk – they tried to hush it up but everyone knows. The children of her co-wife, who used to bait her, all died mysteriously quite suddenly soon after. And his mother gave him up when he was only three.

You’ve probably figured them out, but, in order: Avraham (Abraham), Yaakov (Jacob), Yitzchak (Issac), Yosef (Joseph), Moshe (Moses), Dovid (David) and Shmuel(Samuel).

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3 Responses to “Would You Go Out with this Guy?”

  1. Ginrod Isus November 11, 2007 at 3:41 pm #

    ha! loved it! Makes me feel so *normal*

  2. elie November 13, 2007 at 10:23 am #

    I love that. Those biblical figures, man, they’re so down to earth.

  3. bad4shidduchim November 14, 2007 at 5:52 am #

    From such messed up families. It’s incredibly how far they’ve come… 😉

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